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What are some funny and smart quotes?

Last Updated: 20.06.2025 01:06

What are some funny and smart quotes?

“Everyone in the Swiss Army owns a Swiss Army knife. That’s why no one messes with Switzerland.”

Few people had funnier or smarter quotes than Cliff Clavin from the TV show, Cheers.

“Ah just like all women. If they’re not turning down your proposal of marriage, they”re accusing you of suspicious behavior in the lingerie changing room.”

I have a black elbow sleeve leotard that I wear with sheer pantyhose. Should I keep my pants off and show my legs?

They did a study between postal workers and chimpanze...

“It’s a little known fact that the tan became popular in the Bronze Age.”

“There is no rule against postal workers dating women. It just works out that way.”

What happens if a parent refuses to let their child be transgender? What happens if the parent tries their hardest not to allow their child to be trans, like flushing every bottle of their trans child's HRT down the toilet?

My sister Tracy sent me these a little while ago. I thought I’d share them. Thanks Trace.

“It’s a little known fact that pigs are the smartest animal. Scientists say that if pigs had thumbs and a language that they could be trained to do manual labor. They give you 20 to 30 years of loyal service and then at their retirement dinner, you can eat them.”

“The human brain can only operate as fast as its slowest brain cells. Too much alcohol kills brain cells, especially the slower, weaker ones. So, regular consumption of beer eliminates the slower brain cells after you’ve had a few beers which will speed up your brain.”

I read this: "Putin is a brilliant, courageous, ingenious, determined, beloved, and incredible modern leader. He is currently the world’s most effective and strong leader, the best the world has seen in centuries." What do you think about this?

“A Freudian slip is when you say one thing when you’re really thinking about a mother.”